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Job applicants with extensive interviewing experience know that HR-professionals almost always ask the same questions. But the candidates also use standardized phrases, while they themselves think quite differently.

Question # 1. Why do you want to work in our company?

I think: Are you waiting for me to start to praise your company that has existed for only two weeks? No! I sent my resume to 15 companies – and I will work with any company that will offer the best conditions first. As for your company’s position in the Global market – I do not care!

I say: I know a lot about your company – I have carefully studied your website and read about your organization a lot of publications. I really want to join your wonderful team of professionals! In addition, you are a leader in this segment, and for me it is important to work in a reputable organization with a famous name.

Question # 2. Where do you see yourself in 5 (ten, twenty, and so on) years?

I think: In five years I would like to stay an attractive woman, to have all of the same thick long hair, tight hips, marry a handsome loving man, to have my own luxury car, a house in Amsterdam! And you’re talking about work? I’ve thought about it and decided that I do not deserve to stay in your company more than 1 year…

I say: I hope to engage with your company in a long-term relationship. In five years I plan to work for you! Of course, I would like in this time to get a raise if I can earn it…

Question # 3. What salary do you want?

I think: Ufff … Five hundred million dollars a month! That’s how much I need to be happy! And what do you suggest? 5000? Well, I would not expect more, you didn’t  even offer me some coffee.

I say: I will be quite happy with the salary you listed in the job description. Of course, I will be happy if there is a possibility to increase it and get some bonuses.

Question # 4. Why did you leave your previous job?

I think: There was no point sitting there. Three years without a rise, the work – a solid routine, my boss just lost all his shame… And you, seems like you pay more and the office is much closer to my home.

I say: At a previous job I have achieved great success in my job and felt that I have the potential for further professional development. Unfortunately, the company could not offer me a higher position and new exciting challenges, so I decided to quit. For me it is very important to be able to improve my professional skills.

Question 5. What are your merits and virtues?

I think: I dance Cha-Cha as a professional, my cooking is so delicious, I masterfully play the harmonica and my brother is a boxer! Do you want to marry me or hire me? My main advantages, merits and virtues as a specialist are listed in my resume – pick any!

I say: perseverance, hard work, teamwork, responsibility, honesty, diligence, punctuality…

Question # 6. What are your weaknesses?

I think: You definitely want to marry me! I am, for instance, very lazy. And more… Do you really care? I will not say anything. You can assume that I’m almost a saint.

I say: Sometimes I pay excessive attention to the details, which is why sometimes I check back several times. Fortunately, this disadvantage is compensated by my ability to plan working hours so it does not affect the speed of execution of the tasks.

Question # 7. Why a sewer pit hole cover is round?

I think: Ahhh! Again, that question! And why is the sun round, and a house – rectangular? And why has everyone suddenly became so interested in the history of this damn cover?

I say: I think the round shape is a more technologically advanced solution than a square. First, the round cover can not fall into the sewer pit, as its diameter is larger than the hole’s. Second, the circular lid is easier to transport without the use of special tools – you can simply roll it. And third, round cover opens easier than the square one.

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